Autism and My Joy, My Love, My Son

Sep. 11, 2013 / By


Photo by Jean Melesaine


B.A. King • Silicon Valley De-Bug • Commentary

When she found out her son was diagnosed with autism, she didn’t know what to do. She wrote this letter to her now 3-year-old son, for him, and other families in similar situations, to one day understand what that moment feels like.

At a 1 ½ year old you did not say any words. You knew who were your parents and sisters.

I was very concerned and after speaking with my doctor I took you to the speech and hearing clinic at the local children’s hospital. After 30 minutes the evaluator said, “I think your son has autism, you should get that checked.”

Numb, I sat there for a moment and then I said, “WAIT! What did you say?” She repeated herself “autism, you should get that checked.” I stopped breathing. I felt like I was being punished, cussed out and my heart lost a beat. I was devastated. I wanted to pick you up, cover your ears and run, shield you from the bad words she was saying.

But the evaluator kept talking on and on. Never did she say where I could get help or what I should do. In my mind I said, “I came here for you to help him speak, not tell me YOU THINK he has autism and delayed motor skills.” I could not wait to leave the clinic. Who was this lady to tell me such a thing?

When the evaluation was over I fought back tears, placed you in your stroller, held my head up and walked out. I got in the car called your dad and broke down. I was so shaken I could not even start the car to drive home. Your dad said, “It’s okay baby, God will help us. He will be okay get another opinion.”

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